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| G. Gordon Liddy--A true Patriot |
Anyway, we dug really deep this time, hired G. Gorden Liddy and found the 18 minutes of the missing tape, and decided to post them here for you. We know that LeBlanc will not mind, because we know that Kristen is very busy running her vibrator business and ruining Fox Mill:
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EXAMINER: Explain your motivation for seeking office and any qualifications you possess that would assist in fulfillment of the duties of office.
KRISTEN: My developer friends told me to run so that I could ruin the Village, the same way I ruined Fox Mill. I also like videotaping things. And I sell sex toys. If I can get my developer friends to build me a cheap building, I can stop selling my wares from my garage, and I can expand to peep shows. There is a lot of money in that don't you know.
EXAMINER: Do you believe the Village should continue with the rule-stickler approach to adopted codes, or should a different approach be taken to more quickly resolve potential issues?
KRISTEN: Rules, schmules..... I don't have much use for rules, as long as I am ruling. Isn't Stickler the cute guy in the American Pie movies? I am confused. Can you ask me another question?
EXAMINER: Please briefly describe two or three grant programs you feel the village should be pursuing and how those grants would positively impact the average Campton Hills resident.
KRISTEN: Growing up I always liked Cary Grant movies, so I see your point. Wait a minute, you mean grant as in some free money. Let me think..... my kids like to swim, so I think we should get some money for that. But grant applications have lots of paperwork, right? I don't really like paperwork and I am not very good at it. So I will just stick to swimming grants--Final Answer. Did I win?
EXAMINER: Describe what you would consider an ideal development pattern to be over (the next 40 years). If your vision includes additional commercial components, please identify preferred locations.
KRISTEN: Why would I need a development plan? Didn't you read my first response? I am running to ruin the Village. But, if I were to come up with something I would say I would stick around long enough to make sure all my developer buddies get the OK to build as much residential and commercial developments as humanly possible, at no cost to them. That Bitch Patsy implemented these ridiculous developer impact fees to force my developer friends to pay for the damage and costs of development. That is just stupid. All of the tax payers need to share the pain equally. If you make the developers pay you are taking away from their profit, which means I won't get as much campaign donations.

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